Duct Tape Can't Fix Everything

I want you to think back into the recesses of your mind and think about the last time your child had a toy that broke. (It was probably like last week.) When that toy broke, your child probably cried, they were upset. It was something they valued and now it was broken. As their parent you probably tried really hard to fix it, and maybe it was fixable. Maybe you were able to patch it and the toy was fixed and all was well and the screaming stopped.

Or maybe you patched it but you knew it was a short lived patch. The toy would never be the same again.

But then again maybe it was damaged beyond repair and we knew the toy was trash. There was no point in even getting out the tools.

All three of these scenarios probably involve a small human crying, screaming, and/or acting like the world as they knew it was ending. As their parent you tried to soothe and comfort and explain that it was just a toy and that it would be ok and that sometimes these things happen. Things break and that is just a part of life. Eventually they calmed down and realized that you were right and it would be fine. Life would in fact, go on.

Now why have a rambled on about broken toys and screaming children? Because children have a way of expressing emotion in an incredibly raw way that adults can't. We grow up and we try to stifle how we feel and we shove those emotions down deep. That is how we were taught right? "Life goes on and it is all fine. We don't need to cry about it." When something breaks we don't cry about anymore but maybe we should. Maybe we should allow ourselves to feel and to express in a healthy way so that we don't bottle up that disappointment.

Reality check, when things break as an adult they are probably a lot bigger than the broken toy of our childhood. Maybe it's a marriage, a career, a business, a relationship. Things that really will change our lives forever. I think some of those things warrant some tears.

Maybe it can be patched, maybe you can bust out the duct tape and make some magic happen and fix it, or maybe you can't. If you can't that is ok, you can be sad about it. You can give yourself time to grieve. Just like you told your child, sometimes these things happen and it is ok to be sad. If your child's favorite toy gets broken and has to be thrown away you don't expect them to just be fine and move on. It is something that held extreme value to them. So why do you expect yourself to just "be fine"?

You are allowed to be sad when things in life don't go your way or when things fall apart. Yes, it happens. Yes, it is a part of life but you have to let yourself be broken for a minute so that you can be ok.

The thing we can learn from our kids is that when something breaks and has to be thrown away they let themselves grieve and then they find the sunshine and move on to what is next. They realize that duct tape can't fix everything. They find a "new" toy hiding in the recess of their closet.

I have two challenges that I hope resonate with you today.

#1 What "broken toys" are you holding onto that need to be thrown out? Duct tape can't fix it, it's got to go.

#2 Have you recently thrown away a "broken toy" that you didn't allow yourself time to grieve? What can you do to allow yourself that time?

Love you! Praying for you!

Teal